I have started this blog four times now. I started writing about one thing then Squirrel! Something else. Then wait, Shiny! Let me write about that. Then something else, oops, distracted! Blogger monkey mind. The subject matter has ranged from the deeply personal to the deeply raging. Then I remembered something and decided on something yogic. I'll get there, I promise. Deeply personal because my mother is in a rehabilitation center in Connecticut to (ultimately) get her back to her apartment after two consecutive hospitalizations. That would normally be good news...but with her, so not so much. In this situation, I am an evildoer who seeks to take away her freedoms and independence. To be clear, I have not taken or "made her do" anything. I am supporting the decisions of the medical professionals who say that she needs help for recovery before she goes home. By previously choosing not to take care of herself, she gave those things away. Her blaming me for her situation is yet another symptom of her deeply seated narcissism which culminates in the idea that she is the victim and someone else has to blamed. Deeply raging because POTUS doesn't seem to understand the concept of "relief efforts". Puerto Rico is just taking too damn long to get their shit together and since the infrastructure was crap to start with, why bother? Someone on his staff needs to remind him that there are STILL recovery efforts happening on Staten Island from hurricane Sandy and federal workers were in Louisiana for seven years following Katrina. But Puerto Rico? You suck. Two Cat5 hurricanes in two weeks? Bite me. If you can't make recovery happen within two weeks after that well then, you're just lazy. Don't even get me started on the USVI, gah!
So, to yoga and focus. I started a 300-hour advanced yoga teacher training here in Nyack a month ago. I haven't talked about it much because the reasoning behind doing it is deeply personal. I did my 200-hour certification six years ago, worked to gain an additional 120+ hours through my work with Jill Miller and Yoga Tune Up®, became a cycling coach etc. All done as an aside to my job as a graphic designer. However, after much discussion with my faboo hubby, I made the decision to do this training. I needed to get back to my practice and teaching on my own terms. With that decision I have committed to my education as a student of yoga and to that of being a teacher. Of yoga, of biomechanics, of anatomy, of cycling biomechanics, of philosophy...of whatever people will allow me to communicate to them. I am passionate about sharing the beauty of the body and mind. Last night was one of our weekly training sessions. It revolved around vinyasa and flow (for me, quite intimidating but that is for another blog). A sentence from Allison, one of our advanced trainers stuck with me throughout the evening and into today. As we began our practice she said:
"Develop your Drishti"
Develop your drishti. In yoga, the drishti is the visual point of attention you focus on while you are holding a posture. It could be the wall, the toes, your shin, the fingertips. A fixed point to help you get deeper into your mind and intention while in asana. But the eyes are not hard. It is a soft, easeful gaze. Each time your body changes position, your drishti changes. It is re-established in repeated poses. Soft focus. I feel like the drishti is also something we can apply in our minds. It is so easy to get distracted by news and people and stuff. How do we practice "drishti" of the mind? How do we stay easefully focused on what we are doing, right now. While acknowledging, feeling about and participating in the real world without becoming attached to those events? That's a big concept and frankly my answer is: Hell. I don't know. I'm still super pissed about St. John, Puerto Rico and the rest of the islands crushed by natural disaster...but I feel like if I can remember the words Develop your Drishti, and make it a mantra, I can look at those outside events but remain focused on what I need to accomplish for the betterment of myself (all facets), my immediate family, those I love and by extension the causes I care about.
#dristhi #easefulfocus #focus #easefulgaze #yoga #attention #buddhaeyes